Here Without You
by SasukeFreak34
Summary: How does Ritsuka live without Soubi? How does he cope? Oneshot RitsukaxSoubi Rated T because themes may be difficult to grasp.   R & R/


**Hello Everyone ! ^.^**

**Im back. For now. **

**So, for those who read, my Love, Lies, Perfection story, i re-read it and i realized how immature it was and i could never keep up with the chapters. Im sorry :P Its been deleted.**

**ANYWAY. Ive decided to stick to one-shots for now. Its better that way, no pressure, I can focus on improving my math mark, which realllly needs work... How ironic, for an asian. **

**BUT LETS NOT BE STEREOTYPICAL HERE.**

**Here it is, presented to you, with love and care...**

**MY LOVELESS ONESHOT.**

**I dont own loveless or any of the characters involved or associated with it.**

**But if I did, BELIEVE ME, there would be some .. _changes _**

It was a world of shadows, this constantly recurring nightmare. A world filled with pain that no one but He could stop. Not even Seimei. On those nights, I would wake, shivering in terror, screaming his name. He would not appear through the window. He was gone.

This night was one of such. I woke to the usual screaming, crying, clutching the blankets. Panting, I looked towards the dark window. It was empty, as usual. I forced myself to say the words repeated every night. "He is gone. He is dead. I will forget about Him" I repeated, slowly, building confidence. I, Ritsuka Aoyagi, was going to forget about Him. Forget the accident. Forget the lifeless body… I shook my head to clear the images.

I missed Him terribly. The pain was almost worse than my nightmares, almost worse than when I cried myself to sleep very night. It was then I wished He could have been there to hold me. Walking to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, I reflected on life since He died. Mother had only gotten worse, and Kio had fallen into depression. During that time of sharp sorrow, Yoji and Natsuo were constantly by my side, comforting me. Since then, my pain had dulled to a heartache and they had moved on. I never realized how much I needed Him, I mused as I filled my glass. Not that I was here without Him, all I could think about was finding some sanity in my life. He had been in my life such a short time, yet He would linger forever. It was impossible to close the doors he opened. But I could never step through them. Not without Him. I started back up the dark stairs, my feet treading lightly against the wood.

Reaching my room again, I leaned out the window where He had so often leaned in. I finally allowed my self to think about what happened. It had been a particularly intense battle; it was, after all, against my brother. Seimei had ruthlessly drove Nisei to attack, and my inability to direct Him as needed caused Nisei to drive Him to his knee's, and restricted, I could only watch helplessly as Semei himself delivered the fatal slash with his knife.

Snapping back to reality, I never realized the tears were coming until I tasted them. I had killed Him. My arms were starting to freeze, and as I turned to go, I released a name into the icy air.

"**Soubi?"**

Not far away, A butterfly drifted, its wings the color of frostbite. It floated, gracefully, unsure, plagued by unknown emotions, not knowing how it got there, save for the one crystal clear thing in its mind. It was searching. Searching for Him.

A small light appeared in the distance. As the butterfly got closer, the light brightened, blinded, and beckoned to the trapped soul. The light was punctured by a silhouette. The butterfly surged, drawing closer and closer to the answers he had been waiting for. As the broken soul was enveloped by the brightness, suddenly he remembered the one answer worth remembering.

"**Ritsuka?"**

**_And there you have it. Interpret the ending however you want. _**

**_But in case you mightve been confused, In the first section, Ritsuka's POV, HIM is in reference to Soubi._**

**_But in the second section, Soubi's POV, HIM is in reference to RITSUKA._**

**_Confused?_**

**_I hope not._**

**_BTW, ARE THERE ANY SHINee SHAWOLS OUT THERE ?_**

**_I LOVE SHINee ! ~_**

**_Anyway,, thanks for reading 33_**

**_Loverholic robotronic_**

**_^ If you get this, I LOVE YOU._**

**_JONGKEY FTW 8O_**


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